


Darkness - Nick

by Hellokaelyn



Category: NCIS
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Non-Graphic Violence, Some Swearing, or barely even
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-28
Updated: 2018-10-28
Packaged: 2019-08-08 17:28:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16433738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hellokaelyn/pseuds/Hellokaelyn
Summary: Sequel/Nick's POV of DarknessHe felt darkness consume him before, but pain amplified it.





	Darkness - Nick

**Author's Note:**

  * For [southernbookgirl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/southernbookgirl/gifts), [InsomniacQueen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsomniacQueen/gifts).



> Requested by southernbookgirl & InsomniacQueen :) Sorry If I made you wait!

He didn’t know how long he had been here. 

Nick only knew one thing…

Darkness.

There wasn’t much to do but think when you were chained to a wall, and thinking he learned could be dangerous.

Not only did darkness surround him when he wasn’t getting his daily dose of beatings, stabbings, waterboarding, you name it. But the room itself was full of darkness.

He had felt the darkness inside consume him before, but pain only amplified it. 

Lorenzo would inject him with something to relieve the pain just so his fun could last a little longer. Nick knew it was the only reason he was able to hold on, but the moments where pain did take over meant the darkness inside spread. 

He had tried  _ so hard _ to focus on his training and years of experience but every person had a breaking point.

Nick sometimes wished he could just  _ die _ already.   
  


* * *

Nick remembered the moment he first woke up.

His first thought upon realizing he had been taken was Ellie. While his mind was hazy, he clearly remembered she was with him.  Panic filled him when he didn’t see her with him.

He remembered yanking at the chains in a desperate need to find out where she was. 

Lorenzo had walked in a few minutes later with his cold sneer in place. Nick right away recognized him as the younger brother of a man he helped put away years ago. 

Which meant he had years to prepare for taking Nick. 

“Where’s my partner?” Nick had growled out.

“I didn’t need her.” Lorenzo laughed a cold laugh. “I would have killed the bitch but I learned your prisoners last much longer if they have something to fight for.”

His fist came flying towards Nick’s face.

* * *

“Well..that was some of your best yet.” 

Lorenzo grinned, knife dripping of blood still held at his side. 

“Usually it’s the girls I enjoy hearing scream, but I think yours take the top.”

Nick just wanted him to  _ shut up _ .

Lorenzo bent down in front of Nick, patching up his newest wounds to keep him from bleeding out. He felt bile rise in his throat at the hands on him. 

“No..” Was all he could get away, weakly trying to move away.

Fuck did he hurt all over.

“Aw Nicky, I’m just getting started. You’ve only been here a few months, I haven’t even shown you my best moves yet.”

_ A few months. _

_ Months. _

Nick waited until he left to break.

_ Were they even still looking for him? _

* * *

_ Nick sat on porch steps watching as Ellie chased after a giggling four year old that had slightly darker skin than her but with matching blonde hair. _

_ The little girl shrieked with laughter “You can’t get me mommy!” _

_ “Oh yeah?” Ellie teased. “Why’s that, Lucy?” _

_ “Daddy will protect me!”  _

_ He barely had time to react as the little girl flew towards him, practically jumping into his arms. _

_ “Careful Lucy.” Nick laughed, standing up quickly with her tucked under his arm like a football making her giggle. _

_ “Run daddy run!”  _

_ Nick winked at Ellie before taking off to the backyard, Ellie following him with her laughter ringing in his ears. _

_ “That’s not fair Nick! You’ve always been fast!”  _

_ “Damn straight!”  _

_ “Dollar for the swear jar!” _

_ “Damn isn’t a swear, Luce!”  _

_ “Another dollar!” _

_ “Ellie tell your daughter damn isn’t a swear!” _

_ “Daddy that’s three dollars!” _

_ Ellie burst into laughter. “Oh so she’s my daughter now?” _

_ “Well yeah!” _

_ Nick put the still giggling Lucy down, who ran right towards her mom. _

_ “Mommy tell daddy he has to pay up!” _

_ “What!” Nick gaped at her. “She got that from you!” _

_ Ellie snickered. “Don’t worry Luce, daddy won’t have a choice.”  _

_ Lucy threw her hands up in a cheer. “Yes! Girls win!” _

_ “You were on my side two seconds ago!” _

_ “You swore.” _

_ “Lucy!” Nick shook his head at his daughter, shaking his head with a smile. He walked off to go get his wallet when he suddenly kicked something on the ground hard. “Fuck!” _

_ “Daddy!” Lucy gasped. _

_ Ellie smacked her hand to her forehead. “Nick!” _

_ “What! It hurt!”  _

_ “Fuck!” _

_ Nick and Ellie froze.  _

_ “Lucy!” They both shouted.  _

Nick felt tears fall down his face as he woke up. 

It was only a dream. 

* * *

Nick found he no longer had the strength to keep his head up. 

Maybe it was time he stopped fighting.

Maybe it was better if he just let the pain and darkness completely take over. 

_ ‘Don’t you dare give up Nick!’ _

Nick clenched his jaw.

_ ‘Hang on, Nick. Just hang on.’ _

He wanted to ignore her voice.

_ ‘Keep going Nick. Stay with me.’ _

But hearing her voice was the only peace he felt.

_ ‘We’re coming for you just don’t give up’ _

“Stop...lying…” 

_ ‘I’m coming for you, Nick. I promise’ _

“No..you...aren’t..”

* * *

Nick shuddered as he felt Lorenzo’s breath on his skin, his cold laughter filling his ears as the knife inside him twisted.

A painful moan escaped him.

“Now now, Nicky...that’s not very satisfying.” 

The knife was removed but not for long as Lorenzo found another spot. 

“Years to learn how many different places I can do this without you dying on me…” He put his mouth against Nick’s ear. “But we need a little more fun.”

Nick felt a chill go down his spine when his vision cleared enough to see what was brought into the room.

Lorenzo chuckled while turning it on. 

“Scream for me, Nicky.”

Nick felt it cut into his skin.

He screamed.

* * *

“Nick..”

_ Ellie _ …

“Nick...I love you..”

_ I love you too.. _

Nick opened his eyes the best he could.

Either he had started hallucinating or she really was in front of him.

He tried to smile.

His eyes slid shut again. 

* * *

When Nick opened his eyes again, he was in the hospital.

He could still feel pain but it was dulled. 

His gaze landed on a blonde head resting on the bed beside him.

“Ellie..” He croaked out the best he could.

Her head shot up, eyes wide.

“Oh..oh! Nick!” 

“Hi..”

She looked at him in disbelief. “You’ve been gone for almost six months and the first thing you say is ‘hi’?!” 

One side of his mouth twitch upwards. 

At least the joy of driving her crazy didn’t die in those months.

_ Wait… _

“Six..?”

Ellie swallowed. “Almost..”

“Thanks..”

“For what?” Ellie grabbed his hand.

“Finding me..”

Her hand tightened. “I always will.”

“Love...you..” He got out as he started drifting off. 

He  _ needed _ her to know. 

“I love you, too.”

Finally, he could sleep peacefully.

* * *

Nick had been out of the hospital for a month when he woke up screaming.

“Nick!” Ellie shot up from her spot beside him, immediately trying to sooth him.  

“I’m sorry...fuck..” 

Suddenly he couldn’t breath.

Ellie shot out of the bed, running out of the room.

Nick barely registered it until she was back and shoving an inhaler in his mouth. He felt her hand rubbing his back as he finally got his breath back. 

“You didn’t take your meds.” She stated, not asked.

He shook his head.

“Nick..they help with your attacks, it’s only until you get better.”

“I know.” He sighed, grabbing her hand in his. “I just needed to see if I would be fine without them.”

“Please just take them, okay?” 

Nick laid back down, pulling her to his chest. Ellie rested her chin on him as she looked up at him.

“I promise.” 

“Good, or I would have had to smack your ass.”

He couldn’t help but smirk. “Don’t threaten me with a good time, baby.”

Ellie swatted his chest. “I didn’t mean literally!” 

Her cheeks were pink. 

His little episode were behind them as he pulled her up closer so he could kiss her.

* * *

“You told Vance and Gibbs about me not sleeping?!” 

Ellie jumped as he slammed the door closed.

“They need to know how you’re doing, Nick.”

“No the hell they don’t!” He clenched his jaw. “It’s none of their damn business!”

“It is if you want to go back to work.” She tried reminding him. 

“I do want to, that’s why they didn’t need to know! Now Vance and Gibbs won’t clear me because you told them!”

Ellie ran a hand through her hair in frustration. “You aren’t sleeping Nick, that could be dangerous in our line of work-”

“Really?” Nick laughed emotionlessly. “You went to work without sleeping.”

Nick right away regret the words as they left his mouth.

“Go to hell.” She spat, grabbing her jacket and storming out of the apartment, the door slamming behind her. 

He wasted no time in running after her.

“Ellie! Wait!” 

“No! I’ve been by your side trying to help you for months and this is what I get?!” She spun around to face him, hurt and anger mixed together. “You know damn well I wasn’t sleeping because I couldn’t with you gone and sleep got in the way of finding you!” 

Nick pulled her against his chest and wrapped his arms around her holding on tight even when she tried shoving him away. 

“I’m sorry.” 

She stopped.

“You didn’t deserve that, I shouldn’t be so ungrateful for everything you’ve done for me and are doing.” Nick whispered. “You mean..everything to me, Ellie.”

He heard a sniffle come from her.

“Tell me everything.”

She lifted her head up. “What?”

“Everything you went through and felt during that time, I want to know.” 

“Nick..”

“Tell me.” 

They went back to the apartment and sat in bed for hours talking.

When they were done sharing their months apart, Nick vowed to use the rest of the night to show her how much he loved her.

* * *

Nick stood frozen in the kitchen.

Drops of his blood dripped onto the counter, the knife slipped out of his hand making a noise he didn’t register when it hit the floor.

_ ‘Scream for me, Nicky’ _

“Nick!”

He flinched away from Ellie.

She said nothing as she gently took his hand, pulling him to the sink so she could wash the blood off before covering it up.

“I guess I’m not okay for work..” Nick mumbled.

“There’s nothing wrong with taking more time.” She told him softly.

“Freaking out at the sight of blood.” He chuckled humorlessly. “Makes for a great Agent.”

Ellie turned him to face her. 

“You’ve gotten so much better, Nick.” She reminded him. “In time this will all just be a memory, you just need some patience.”

Nick sighed and kissed her forehead. “You seem to have a ton of that.”

She shrugged. “I did grow up with three brothers, patience was needed to survive.” 

He smiled. 

* * *

“You dreamed of...us with a daughter?”

Nick nodded. 

Ellie couldn’t help the grin on her face. “What was her name?”

“Lucy.” He said softly. It may have been a dream but sometimes he swore he could still hear her giggle in his ears.

“Lucy…” Ellie said to herself. “It means light you know….that’s really fitting.”

“It is.” 

“Does..does that mean that’s what you want?” She asked him.

Nick kissed her softly. “I want it all with you...I never thought I would with anyone after Sofia but I want a house with the typical white picket fence, a big yard,  _ and _ a Lucy.”

Ellie pushed him back and straddled him, kissing him deeply.

“Me too.”

* * *

Nick sat at his desk, smiling softly at Ellie as she handed him back the picture of himself. 

Except instead of putting it on his desk he opened one of the draws and slid it in.

She gave him a confused look.

“I can be reminded of Sofia by just remembering her, but I think it’s time I put other things on my desk to be reminded of.”

Nick reached into his bag and pulled out another framed picture.

Ellie grinned when she seen what it was. A picture of them grinning widely looking happy as can be.

“Welcome back.” 

Both of them jumped and turned to see Gibbs and Tim standing behind them smiling.

“Thanks.” Nick laughed. “Good to be back.”

Gibbs clapped a hand on his shoulder before moving to his own desk.

As Nick watched Ellie and Tim argue about some nerd thing he didn’t understand, he thought of his words.

It  _ was  _ good to be back.

Ellie looked at him and smiled.

All the last bits of darkness disappeared almost like smoke. 


End file.
